tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6394006783856663982024-02-06T21:35:12.779-08:00Things my Grandkids Should KnowAxiesdadhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03273751356283986043noreply@blogger.comBlogger49125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-639400678385666398.post-76471993671038253092022-08-24T08:14:00.000-07:002022-08-24T08:14:06.110-07:00Finding Joy<p> A friend of mine recently said, "I've lost my joy." It wasn't that she was afraid it was gone forever, just that in the moment, while dealing with some stressful events, she was unable to enjoy life as she normally did. </p><p>And this essay just took a sudden turn. I was this many years old when I thought of the relationship between "joy" and "enjoy." That prefix, en, turns the passive "joy" into something active and internal; something we do not something external that just happens to us. </p><p>Meanwhile, back at the main subject, as I thought about what my friend's predicament, I found myself remembering a time when joy found me. It wasn't one of those big moments like the birth of one of our children or the moment I realized I was in love; I don't think we are conscious of the joy then because we are too overwhelmed with it. </p><p>This particular time I was mowing a yard. The riding mower was making its normal isolating roar so I was completely alone with my thoughts. Then, rather suddenly, I noticed my physical surroundings; brilliant blue summer sky, not too hot, not too cold, the grass a lovely shade of green, a soft breeze. In that moment I became aware, really aware, that I was experiencing joy; visibly, consciously, EXPERIENCING it. I remember thinking something along the lines of "Wow! This is some kind of perfect; this is about as good as it can possibly get." I'm sure it was the first time that I was aware of my emotional response to something. I was in a sense outside of myself watching myself have the experience.<br /></p><p>I guess what is unique about it is how it has stuck with me. I can still conjure up that moment in time and relieve an instant of a summer day that was just about perfect. The best part? That summer day happened over sixty years ago, when I was fourteen or fifteen years old. It was, for me, a kind of awakening. From that day on I believe that, when I have chosen to, I have been able to better see the world I live in and better appreciate all that is good in it.</p><p>And that, finally, brings me back to the friend's comment that started this thought train. We can treasure those little moments that brought us joy, and we can store them up. That first "joy" memory is a kind of touchstone for me. When life is hard and loss is overwhelming, if I can remember to remember, I can go back to that perfect time and know and feel joy, whatever the current circumstance. With that remembering comes the certain knowledge that there IS joy, that I have experienced it before and that it will come again.<br /></p><p><br /></p><p><br /></p>Axiesdadhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03273751356283986043noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-639400678385666398.post-7111976388396108432015-07-23T17:31:00.000-07:002015-07-23T17:31:37.102-07:00ALMOST A LOVE STORY<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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Here’s a “might have been” story from my past, fifty years
past. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It takes place in late May or
early June of 1965.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There’s no message
here, just a little of Grandpa B’s history and maybe a little impetus for
reflection.</div>
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I had just completed my sophomore year at Aurora College and
my friend, Ken, who had come there from Maine, was looking for someone to share
driving chores so he could go home for a few days before returning to a job in
Illinois.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I was twenty years old and had
basically never been anywhere so I jumped at the chance.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Our route took us across Canada so I even got
to leave the country for the first time; and then added the states of New York,
Vermont, New Hampshire and Maine to the few Midwestern states I had already
visited or lived in. Driving straight through, trading drivers whenever one of
us got too tired to continue, took about twenty four hours. </div>
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Seeing new places and hearing different regional accents
were wonderful, as was seeing the ocean for the first time. I still have among
my mementos a piece of granite the size and shape of a baseball that I brought home from my day at the ocean.</div>
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My friend had a younger sister, Lois, who was just days away
from graduating from high school.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She
played hooky (skipped school if you are unfamiliar with “hooky”) for one of the
days Ken and I were there.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I actually
don’t remember any of the things we did that day other than riding around in
Ken’s car seeing the local sights which were mostly pine forests and potato
fields.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
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Late in the day as we were heading back to the little town they
lived in I found her hand in mine, feeling as though it really belonged
there.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I remember looking at her and
seeing her smiling and wondering why.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
knew I was feeling especially good but wasn’t sure what was prompting her mood.</div>
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Two days later Ken and I were on our way back to Aurora, she
and I never so much as shared a kiss, and I never saw her again.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We did exchange a few letters and in one of
them I asked her why she had been smiling so that night.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Her answer was that she had been feeling as I
had and that holding my hand had been special for her just as it had been for
me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In time, we each went on in our own
directions, but I still think of her some times and may still have the one
photo I took of her tucked away with some other memories.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
There is nothing that would induce me to trade the life I
have had for any other, or even to wish that I could.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It is simply pleasant to reminisce and maybe
spend a few minutes thinking of what “might have been.” I hope life has been as
good to her as it has been to me.</div>
Axiesdadhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03273751356283986043noreply@blogger.com12tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-639400678385666398.post-37090640882109245552015-07-16T08:01:00.000-07:002015-07-20T08:01:33.453-07:00THE SHADOW CAST BY LOVEMost of my essays are pretty upbeat. Life has been very good to me and that is something I want to share. This one is a little different. It's about sadness and the pain of loss. Life, no matter how good, is not pain free, and the more we have the more we can lose.<br />
<br />
About a year ago my oldest son had to take his cat to the vet to be put down because all efforts to fix its health problems had failed. He knew it was what needed to be done and somehow summoned the courage to do it, but he was hurt terribly by the loss. In talking to him about it, I came up with the phrase, "Grief is the shadow cast by love." What I was saying is that when grief seems overwhelming it is because we have had the gift of being able to love, to have something or someone fill our lives so much that the loss is a physical pain.<br />
<br />
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A few months later, I experienced first hand (again) just what I was talking about. Our beloved Labrador retriever, Rowdy, had been deteriorating physically for over a year and the day after Christmas went into convulsions and then coma. We cared for him through the next day and night until he died the following morning. I was spared that awful trip to the vet, but that was small comfort when the space in my heart that he had filled for almost ten years was suddenly so empty. It's been seven months now and the pain has eased, but still there is seldom a day goes by that I don't feel it at all.<br />
<br />
Josh and I could have avoided all that pain by simply not allowing his cat or my dog into our lives in the first place. We also would have eliminated a whole lot of warmth and joy and laughter. We would have given up the chance to love and be loved. Believe me, our pets do return the love we give them. They offer no criticism or judgement, only affection.<br />
<br />
So, is that the answer? Avoid the pain by forgoing the joy? I certainly don't think so. Over the years, I have loved and lost many beloved pets, mostly dogs, but also cats and even an iguana who lived with us for fifteen years. Every one of them more than repaid the emotional cost of losing them. I remember the joy much more than the pain.<br />
<br />
Kahlil Gibran said it best in <u>The Prophet</u>, "without love you laugh, but not all of your laughter; weep, but not all of your tears." Thank you to Rowdy and all his predecessors, for my laughter and for my tears. The shadow, grief, is only there because of the substance, love.<br />
<br />
<img alt="" src="http://www.grandmasbriefs.com/storage/GRANDsocialbutton.jpg?__SQUARESPACE_CACHEVERSION=1403499127249" /> <br />
<br />Axiesdadhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03273751356283986043noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-639400678385666398.post-66307736095394558612015-07-03T08:16:00.000-07:002015-07-06T07:39:59.955-07:00Like a Kite?"I saw the brightly coloured kite yanking hard at the thread that held
it tethered to the Earth. It was obvious just how much its heart
yearned to break free and soar with the sea breeze.<br />
'You are like that kite. Tied down by the limitations created by your own mind. Break free. Live!' "<br />
<br />
I read this lovely bit of writing in another blog and my cynical mind immediately flashed back to when I flew kites as a boy. What I remembered was that when the kite string broke the kite did NOT fly free; it fluttered to earth where it would lay helpless and inert.<br />
<br />
Being fond of metaphors, I then thought of how this actual behavior of kites was a more accurate reflection of our lives. We need something that tethers us to reality if we are going to soar, without it we crash. What is the string that keeps us "flying" at the same time it binds us to one spot? Who is holding the string? Who can stretch a metaphor to the breaking point?<br />
<br />
There certainly is a time in our lives, usually our teens, when we want to cut all those strings. We question why our parents and society have told us to act certain ways and we may even actively rebel against many of those rules. Good for us! With no questions and no rebellion, there would be no progress. The tricky part is in learning what things to rebel against and what to embrace. Maturity, in part, is learning what parts to hang on to; what strings do we need to keep us airborne.<br />
<br />
My generation, coming to maturity in the 1960s was one of the most rebellious in history. We questioned everything we were told was true. One of our most notorious protesters famously said, "Never trust anyone over thirty." We challenged many things, like the Vietnam war and racial segregation, that needed to be challenged, and we also tended to "throw the baby out with the bath water." If parents or government or church said it was good, we rejected it. So along with equal rights and an end to that particularly hideous and pointless war we also promoted indiscriminate sex and drug use. We broke the string, and many of us crashed to the ground. We also soared.<br />
<br />
I've been trying to finish this for some time now, to bring it to some sort of conclusion, to make some point. No such luck. I've had some fun playing with a metaphor, and touched a couple of old memories, so I'll just have to be satisfied with that.<br />
<br />
<img alt="" src="http://www.grandmasbriefs.com/storage/GRANDsocialbutton.jpg?__SQUARESPACE_CACHEVERSION=1403499127249" /><br />
<br />Axiesdadhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03273751356283986043noreply@blogger.com11tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-639400678385666398.post-44882572912655668952015-05-19T09:28:00.001-07:002015-06-01T05:31:44.050-07:00I Wish I had Told HerThe title of this piece is a comment I made to a post written by Pam over at Neffroad.com. She had written about the women who were "mothers" to her when she was a child and of course this made me think of my own.<br />
<br />
My grandchildren, I watch your mother raising you, and I am in awe of how much she does. She works hard and consciously at the task of being a good mother, devoting her time and talent to providing you with all the opportunities, experiences, and education possible. On top of this she shows you and tells you over and over that she loves you.<br />
<br />
Rural women like my mother, who grew up in the depression, were different in many ways. They were, in someone's words, "made of sterner stuff." Working hard, all day every day, to provide a home was pretty much their "raison d'etre." I'm sure Mother never thought she had a hard life, it was just life.<br />
<br />
Washday was a once a week all day affair. Clothes were put one load at a time through the washer, then one piece at a time through the wringer into the first rinse tub, then through the wringer a second time into the second rinse, and finally a third trip through the wringer into the laundry basket. Then it was out to the yard with them (a basket full of damp clothes is heavy) to be hung on the clothes line. Once dry they were brought back in to be ironed, and there was no such thing as permanent press<br />
<br />
Many long summer days were spent in a kitchen that would have done credit to a
steam bath, canning hundreds of jars of tomatoes, corn, and beans. Hens that were past their prime for egg laying also ended up in canning jars, another job that took a full day to accomplish. After they were killed by a quick blow with an ax they had to be processed. First they were dipped in boiling water (steam bath again) to loosen the feathers; then the feathers were pulled out by hand. Wet feathers stink! Next the entrails were removed and the whole birds went into a huge pot of (again) boiling water where they stewed until the meat could be easily removed from the bones. Finally the cooked meat and broth went into the canning jars, which were once more heated to boiling and sealed for storage. Fruits were either canned or turned into jams and jellies. (More than a half century later I still can't abide strawberry jam, which we had in abundance.)<br />
<br />
Of course this work was all in addition to the continuing tasks of preparing three meals a day, cleaning the house, tending the yard and the garden (where all those fruits and vegetables came from) and the flock of chickens. Raising two boys also made demands on her time. It was she who taught us responsibility, supervising us as we completed our "chores," tasks that she could have done more quickly herself, so that we not only learned how to do them but also that we needed to pull our own weight.<br />
<br />
All of this hard physical work didn't leave much time or energy for playing games and reading stories; my brother and I learned to entertain ourselves. We also learned that "I'm bored" would most likely be met with an opportunity to add to our assigned tasks. At best we would be told to go outside and play.<br />
<br />
Through all this, we never doubted that we were loved. In fact, it was something that we never thought about. Love wasn't expressed with hugs and kisses; the words "I love you" were never spoken, but as an old man, I can look back and see that my brother and I were loved, as much as anyone's children were ever loved. Mother literally, every day, gave her life for her family; from the time she got up until the time she went to bed all her efforts were for us. And that's what I wish I had told her.<br />
<br />
<img alt="" src="http://www.grandmasbriefs.com/storage/GRANDsocialbutton.jpg?__SQUARESPACE_CACHEVERSION=1403499127249" /> Axiesdadhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03273751356283986043noreply@blogger.com13tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-639400678385666398.post-61048167298100560142015-04-10T09:42:00.004-07:002015-04-17T07:28:50.668-07:00Let Me Help<div class="MsoNormal">
“Here, let me give you a hand with that.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“No thanks, I’ve got it.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I hate to think how many times the second
voice in that conversation has been mine.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Let you help me?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>No way!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m independent, I’m strong, I’m self-reliant.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m stupid.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Not only am I too stupid to ask for help, I even turn it
down when it is offered.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I tell myself
that I do this because I don’t want to put anyone out; I don’t want to impose.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>These are lies I tell myself.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It is really fear that makes me turn away
every offer of help. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It may be a reluctance
to be in anyone’s debt, but mostly it is fear of admitting weakness or
admitting failure. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If I allow someone to
help me, I’m telling my ego that I am not superman.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My ego doesn’t like that.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
There are, of course, times when asking for help has been
made necessary by bad choices I have made.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Those times are especially hard on the ego because the weakness and
failure that they illustrate was real.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Many times though, asking for, or at least accepting, help is
simply the smart thing to do.<br />
<br />
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
For example, some years ago I went sailing on Lake
Geneva.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I belonged to a sailing club and
we had a number of boats there that day ranging from 14 to 24 feet long.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The wind was strong and the water was a
little rough, but the first half of the day I was on one of the larger boats,
enjoying the ride and snapping pictures with the fairly expensive camera I had brought
along.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>After we stopped for lunch, a
woman who had been on one of the smaller boats was talking about not sailing back
because of the roughness of the water.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
offered to trade places with her so she could ride in the larger, more comfortable
boat.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She quickly accepted and then
asked if I would like her to take my camera with her because it might get wet in
the smaller craft.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>For no good reason
except that I always turn down help, I said no.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Well of course, halfway across the lake we capsized the little sailboat
and my camera didn’t get wet, it got drowned.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>All I needed to have done was accept the small favor she had offered,
which would have not imposed on her at all, and I might still have that camera.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Sometimes refusing to ask for or accept help can have much
more serious consequences than just a destroyed camera.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In my twelve step group it is vital.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We begin recovery by admitting we are
powerless.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Without help it is too much
for us,” but by depending and leaning on each other we succeed.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Equally as important as receiving help, is
giving it. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It is by helping others that
we strengthen ourselves.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It is only by
helping others that we are able to save ourselves.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I frequently admonish the young men I counsel
to not reject help.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>To help them
overcome their reluctance I ask them if they like to help people; I ask them
how they feel when they have helped someone.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Always they say that, yes, they do like helping, it feels good to help.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I then ask them to not deny the privilege of
helping to others. When you ask for help, you are usually doing the one you ask
a favor.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You are giving them an
opportunity to do good, and it feels good to do good. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Hopefully, you will never need for that kind
of helping to be part of your lives, but the lesson that helping and being
helped are both good should be.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Be self reliant, that’s a good thing. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But don’t be afraid to ask for help or to
accept it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Remember, "We are all in this
together,” and giving and getting help is how we succeed in life.<br />
<br />
<img alt="" src="http://www.grandmasbriefs.com/storage/GRANDsocialbutton.jpg?__SQUARESPACE_CACHEVERSION=1403499127249" /></div>
Axiesdadhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03273751356283986043noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-639400678385666398.post-69342270091122176332015-02-28T10:43:00.002-08:002015-03-04T11:51:04.729-08:00"At The Movies"<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 9.0pt; line-height: 115%;">"Which movies would you direct me to as 'MUST WATCH'??"</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 9.0pt; line-height: 115%;">A friend, on learning that Grandma B and I own over 2000
movies on VHS or DVD recently asked me that question. I guess their assumption
is that anyone who has so many movies must know something about them.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Never assume.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>It did occur to me that knowing something of my taste in movies might
help you, my grandchildren, to know me a little better.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This would be in keeping with your Dad’s
initial request that inspired this blog. So here is my answer to the must watch
question. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 9.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 9.0pt; line-height: 115%;">I have an answer, but I must protest that the question is
a little vague.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Movies come in all
shapes and sizes and there are a variety of reasons why different ones should
be on your viewing list.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Do you want
warm and inspiring, with beloved Hollywood stars in the lead roles?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“It’s a Wonderful Life” has to be at the top
of the list.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A three hanky tear jerker,
“Love Story” or “An Affair to Remember.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Big adventure movies litter the landscape, but you can’t go wrong with
“Star Wars,” “Jaws” or just about any of the “franchise“ movies that have
spawned multiple sequels.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Horror movies
are not my thing but if you must have one the original “Halloween” would be my
choice.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 9.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Comedies offer a whole subset of choices.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If you would have a rounded exposure, some of
the classic oldies where the stars were the reason to see them are important
(and they are classics because they are so good). I’m talking about the Marx
Brothers, W. C. Fields, Abbott and Costello, and others whose name on the
marquee was all that was needed to sell tickets. Modern romantic comedies or
“rom coms” provide a glut of forgettable movies, but a few stand out.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“While You Were Sleeping” is one we have
watched many times.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Tom Hanks and Meg
Ryan teamed up for some really good ones.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>“When Harry Met Sally” is marvelous.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>My personal favorite comedy across all the subsets is “Young Frankenstein”
but it probably helps to see the original “Frankenstein” and “Bride of
Frankenstein” first (They are worth seeing anyway, even though they are
“horror” movies).</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 9.0pt; line-height: 115%;">The Western movie at the top of my list would have to be,
“The Magnificent Seven.” <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Favorite war
movie, “The Enemy Below” (not the best, whatever that means, just my favorites).</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 9.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Musicals are not to everyone’s taste, but if you like
them or just want to give one a try, “Singin’ In the Rain” would be my first
choice.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s fun and funny, and great
dancing and songs you will find yourself humming the next day.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Most musicals are adaptations from Broadway
shows so if you want a taste of the Great White Way without going to New York
and dropping a week’s pay on a ticket these can give you that.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Camelot,” <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“West Side Story” and “My Fair Lady” are
timeless and wonderful.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Some others are
kind of dated and may seem to promote social attitudes that are no longer
acceptable.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 9.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Dramas, dramatic movies, are a whole different thing.
They move us emotionally and at their best help us grow as human beings.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They can help us see the world differently,
through other people’s eyes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They teach
us. Sharing the triumphs and tragedies of screen characters is why we go to
these movies.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Some allow us, for a few
hours, to vicariously live lives that seem bigger than our own, and they don’t
get any bigger than “Gone With The Wind.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 9.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Now I will end this essay by actually answering the
question. There is one movie that I believe everyone on Earth SHOULD see.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I only watched it once, and can’t bring
myself to watch it again, but I will never forget it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The movie is Steven Spielberg’s “Schindler"s
List.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It shows us the darkest side of
humanity in a way that can’t be forgotten, but also lets us aspire to be good
men as Oskar Schindler was a good man. I don’t suppose many people would call
it the best picture of all time, but it has my vote for most important.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 9.0pt; line-height: 115%;">So there are some of my thoughts on movies.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I love romantic movies and rom coms (aka chick
flicks).<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I don’t care for 99% of what
are called horror.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I think movies can be
socially important, but first and foremost they are entertainment.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Silly comedies and mindless action movies
also deserve to be made and should not make us feel guilty for watching
them.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Enjoy the movies, and as Siskel
and Ebert used to say, “Save me the aisle seat.”</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 9.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> </span><a href="http://grandmasbriefs.com/" rel="nofollow" target="blank"><img alt="Grandma’sBriefs.com" src="http://grandmasbriefs.squarespace.com/storage/GRANDsocialbutton.jpg" height="125" width="125" /></a></div>
Axiesdadhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03273751356283986043noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-639400678385666398.post-14884383309516188162014-11-24T11:58:00.000-08:002014-11-24T12:08:33.801-08:00Barns RevisitedI haven't put up a new post for some time, mostly because I just haven't felt like I have anything more to say. This picture that I took a week ago has made me want to at least try.<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiOvPC3Q1nD5bJ-p9zGWJ2WNU8W9S5KAVE4Z552w0LmhC0Xyrgm59tVNJqhm8i2OxcKFHll3baf1O5ScTciAg5JbuSSm_Vs1TmeQjoIA3XW8LIWETQ8LNqAfzqfEi0eqKwqcTkEfXZarw/s1600/DSC_0008+(2).jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiOvPC3Q1nD5bJ-p9zGWJ2WNU8W9S5KAVE4Z552w0LmhC0Xyrgm59tVNJqhm8i2OxcKFHll3baf1O5ScTciAg5JbuSSm_Vs1TmeQjoIA3XW8LIWETQ8LNqAfzqfEi0eqKwqcTkEfXZarw/s1600/DSC_0008+(2).jpg" height="213" width="320" /></a></div>
It's just an old abandoned barn, slowly crumbling away, but looking at it makes me think about life, and long ago; fond memories and melancholy recollections too. I wrote about "The Old Barn" in one of my early posts, how it was the playground of our childhood. That barn is long gone now, like most others of its kind. The old has been torn down to make room for the new or just allowed to decay because it isn't needed anymore. The value of these old buildings that can be measured in dollars and cents has dwindled to nothing, and sentimental value doesn't pay the bills on a working farm. I can't fault the owners for getting rid of a tax liability and returning the land to productive use; I am just saddened a little that the way of life that flourished around these structures is gone and that the memories of it are fading too.<br />
<br />
Old things are preserved in museums so that we can catch a glimpse of the past. Limited space and limited resources dictate what can be preserved. There are a few "historic" farms that survive by selling tickets for that glimpse. I'm not sure it works to visit these places unless they were once a part of your life. That old barn is just a pile of boards unless it contains memories.<br />
<br />
It was on my seventieth birthday that I took this picture and I suppose that that milestone has something to do with the mood of it. The longer ago "long ago" becomes, the more precious (and more romanticized) the memories become. "Three score and ten" was long considered a man's allotted time. I feel grateful to have been given my full allotment and have a reasonable expectation that I have a decade or two left. I do not intend to spend all of that time reminiscing about what has been; I look forward to adding to my store of memories and to sharing some of them. But, the memories are a warm place to visit and sometimes long ago doesn't seem very far away at all.<br />
<br />
<img alt="" src="http://www.grandmasbriefs.com/storage/GRANDsocialbutton.jpg?__SQUARESPACE_CACHEVERSION=1403499127249" />Axiesdadhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03273751356283986043noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-639400678385666398.post-38244236432664374452014-03-19T14:45:00.000-07:002014-03-24T11:26:25.123-07:00ROCKING (as in rock music) WITH YOUR DADWhen your dad was fifteen years old, his favorite music was heavy metal rock and at least for a time his favorite band was "Metallica." One day he told us that the group was performing at the World Theater near Chicago and that he and his two best friends were going to the concert. I had no problem with this, but when he said that his friend "D", who had just turned sixteen and gotten his driver's license was going to drive I balked. No way was I going to trust my son's life to a novice driver in rock concert traffic. Since they were determined to go, I told them I would take them there and wait for them in the parking lot.<br />
<br />
A few days before the concert, they surprised me with the announcement that they didn't think I should just sit in the parking lot so they had bought a ticket for me as well. I had no real idea what I was getting into, but I had grown up with rock and roll so I figured I would enjoy it and was pleased that they wanted to include me. When we arrived at the World, an outdoor amphitheater holding thousands of fans, I found my fears of the traffic completely justified. It was bumper to bumper for at least a half mile leading into the parking lot, and I knew that the after concert traffic would be total madness.<br />
<br />
The theater had seating under the pavilion roof, and standing room in the grass covered open air bowl. In theory you could sit on the grass, but in fact no one did because the crowd was constantly moving and frequently "mosh pits" (more of them later) would spring randomly into existence. The crowd was boisterous and happy, enjoying every minute while waiting for the show to start. <br />
<br />
My first revelation of what I was in for came when they began testing the sound system. One of the technicians walked onto the stage and thumped the bass drum. I didn't hear the thump, I FELT it. That thump, amplified through enormous speakers on the roof, hit me in the chest like the concussion from a Fourth of July aerial bomb. THIS WAS GOING TO BE FUN!<br />
<br />
Now back to the mosh pits. This is a little like bumper cars without the cars. People start good natured pushing and bumping and suddenly a circle opens in the crowd as non-participents back away and there you have a mosh pit. When one of these opened up right in front of us I was watching and enjoying when suddenly somebody pushed me from behind. Since the ground sloped down from where we were standing, I couldn't stop but had to travel right across to the other side. Once there, I had no way to return to the boys except to charge uphill bouncing off the other moshers. I arrived back at the top to find the boys doubled over with laughter and just a little bit in awe of the old man mosher. Did I mention that at forty eight or nine I was probably the oldest person in the entire crowd? None of the boys would admit to being the one who pushed me and still haven't to this day. I too thought it was pretty funny and am actually grateful to whoever gave me that memorable experience. I have Moshed!<br />
<br />
The actual music of the event was something that I think I enjoyed just as much as the boys. The opening act was trying too hard to be cool and not that great musically. The second group was much better and for a time I thought they were Metallica. When the headliners finally did take the stage, I was just as blown away as the die hard fans. They were great! There is something special that happens at a live performance by really talented people and these guys had what it takes to make it happen. Of course, I couldn't actually hear any of the vocals, only the instruments, because it seemed that every member of the audience knew all the words to every song and sang right along with the band. That didn't matter, because it was the shared experience that made it all so memorable.<br />
<br />
Getting out after the concert was every bit the nightmare I had imagined, so I simply insisted that we sit in the parking lot not even trying to move until the madness had subsided. Finally, four tired but happy fans were able to safely drive home, with memories I am sure we all still hold.<br />
<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjLqsjWGdBh_7V2G4Rjwlh2dy8TINYDkmOJt2afhnElswzPCqBB5kZkVQqjzNMYka4NIG6F5bosVsv8kQwXTm7CujxgQTTAS9idqc0KgGi8tRhyphenhyphen3mtOmy4yNsE7rUCmBL5Lt1hDc1kXUw/s1600/IMG.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjLqsjWGdBh_7V2G4Rjwlh2dy8TINYDkmOJt2afhnElswzPCqBB5kZkVQqjzNMYka4NIG6F5bosVsv8kQwXTm7CujxgQTTAS9idqc0KgGi8tRhyphenhyphen3mtOmy4yNsE7rUCmBL5Lt1hDc1kXUw/s1600/IMG.jpg" height="320" width="240" /></a>One more thing came out of the event. Not long after, Grandma B was looking at a mail order catalog and found a T shirt with an image of the title character from Metallica's "Sandman" album on it. She saw how much the picture looked like my dad so we got the shirt and gave it to him. Here is the result.<br />
<br />
<img alt="Grandma’sBriefs.com" src="http://grandmasbriefs.squarespace.com/storage/GRANDsocialbutton.jpg" />Axiesdadhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03273751356283986043noreply@blogger.com12tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-639400678385666398.post-29622224178410442602014-03-05T15:51:00.000-08:002014-03-17T14:28:57.961-07:00Misty Watercolor Memories"The Way We Were" is the beautiful, melancholy title song from a movie that came out in 1973, the year Grandma B and I met. "Memories light the corners of my mind; misty watercolor memories of the way we were." Those are the opening lines of the song and describe the mood I often find myself in as I begin one of these essays. Reminiscing lets me revisit the past with filters in place to block out the less pleasant parts. <br />
<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjWBNl97MqVfPmiAfPDtDlBtOjoPGuSsVbJqt6bpkXfdXayFk8ahJHFrJK9icA8vPwW92TN5skAlyOro8KpM4t4lWefMqMphS37WOHSLfrBQ7g-Z6Iui5nfYt7Ik4PdiLWuyTrSlwMJsQ/s1600/015.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjWBNl97MqVfPmiAfPDtDlBtOjoPGuSsVbJqt6bpkXfdXayFk8ahJHFrJK9icA8vPwW92TN5skAlyOro8KpM4t4lWefMqMphS37WOHSLfrBQ7g-Z6Iui5nfYt7Ik4PdiLWuyTrSlwMJsQ/s1600/015.JPG" height="217" width="320" /></a>Many of the art prints we have hanging on the walls of our house are literal "misty watercolors." I don't know if there is really a connection there, but it seems that my way (and perhaps most people's way) of remembering the past is like the artist Paul Sawyier's way of capturing his beloved Kentucky River Valley in his paintings. The rough edges are smoothed away by the fog of selective remembering and the glow of sentiment highlights the good times. At times, even imagination plays a role in our remembering, in the same way his "Mile High Bridge" uses memory and fantasy to create an ethereal scene that never was.<br />
<br />
There is no doubt that my childhood memories benefit from the filter of time. Living in unheatable houses, wearing hand me down clothes, and having the same thing in my school lunch pail every day is not the stuff of idyllic childhood; But growing up in a loving family, part of an extended family of grandparents, uncles, aunts and cousins who all cared for one another was more than compensation, and I only wish that everyone's memories could be as happy as mine.<br />
<br />
I have to admit to a certain enjoyment of the melancholy part of memory as well. A little wistful longing for what once was, a dash of pondering what might have been, and maybe even a touch of regret all add to the flavor of memory. Dabbling in melancholy is mostly a good way to "pinch myself awake;" to wake me up to recognizing how profoundly I have been blessed. I don't need to look at my life through a veil of mist that hides the rough edges; I can see very clearly that I am "The Richest Man I Know."<br />
<br />
<img alt="Grandma’sBriefs.com" src="http://grandmasbriefs.squarespace.com/storage/GRANDsocialbutton.jpg" />Axiesdadhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03273751356283986043noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-639400678385666398.post-4596692883572357052014-02-26T15:42:00.000-08:002014-03-12T13:00:58.588-07:00"The World is so Full of Such Wondrous Things..." <br />
<br />
When I was in grade school, I learned to square dance, the American folk dance where the couples and groups of couples perform steps like dosey-do and promenade as they are announced by a "caller." It was fun. When I was in junior high I was taken to a symphony orchestra concert that featured singers doing the arias from "Carmen," and it was fun. I learned to bowl in high school, and it was fun. I've been to a heavy metal concert, I've seen an exhibition of Monet paintings, and I've seen and acted in live theater. I've shot guns, planted gardens and even earned a living by doing hard physical work, and it was all fun. OK, the hard physical work wasn't as much fun all of the time; The point is, I've tried lots of things and found something to enjoy in most of them. I try hard to not decide I don't like something before I have tried it.<br />
<br />
Who is more foolish, someone who enjoys what we consider a foolish
pastime, or someone who dismisses as foolish a pastime which they have
never tried? The world is so full of things to try that we can never try them all. If we don't have enough of an open mind to give things a shot when they present themselves we may miss out on the best thing ever. If someone invites you to try curling don't decide not to go because "sliding rocks on ice is dumb." Enough people enjoy it to make curling an Olympic sport so there must be something to it.<br />
<br />
Of course, common sense tells us not to try things that are stupidly dangerous; I'm not advocating playing in traffic because it might be a thrill. Bull riding and auto racing are probably best left to the pros and enjoyed as spectator sports. What I'm saying is that activities/experiences that you haven't yet tried should not be subject to "condemnation prior to investigation."<br />
<br />
Everyone knows (and many of us have been) a child who is a picky eater. If you take them to a restaurant that doesn't have mac 'n cheese, you had better bring along a pbj. We laugh, but still we try to change them because we know they are missing out on some good things. Shrimp in lobster sauce sounds kinda weird, but as served at Jimmy Wong's restaurant in Chicago back when I was in my twenties, it was one of the most delicious things I ever ate. Taste all the things life offers. You will not like all of them, but you won't miss out on the good ones.<br />
<br />
<br />
<img alt="Grandma’sBriefs.com" src="http://grandmasbriefs.squarespace.com/storage/GRANDsocialbutton.jpg" />Axiesdadhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03273751356283986043noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-639400678385666398.post-3743335162357263172014-02-03T11:26:00.000-08:002014-02-03T11:31:00.429-08:00SOMETHING SPECIALOne of the things your dad suggested as a possible topic for these scribblings was "things you are proud of." Looking back, that seems a topic far too soon exhausted, but I do have a few candidates for it. One of these is a title given to me by your dad's preschool teacher, Miss Polly, when he was four years old.<br />
<br />
For several months in early 1983 I was laid off from my job because of a long strike by the union workers at Caterpillar. Grandma B was pregnant with your Uncle Ryan, and since I had time on my hands it was easier for me than for her to take your dad to school and pick him up after. Some mornings I would just stay at the school and watch the kids instead of driving home and coming back. At some point, I noticed that some of the wooden chairs that the kids sat on were loose and wobbly and asked the teacher if she would like me to repair them. She was happy to have me do it so the next day I showed up with some tools, glue, and clamps and started in. I didn't have enough clamps to do a lot of chairs at once and most of the chairs were needed each day anyway, so I came back day after day until I had finished all the chairs. Many of the kids found what I was doing fascinating to watch and I would try to explain to them what I was doing, why the chairs had to be clamped or bound with rope while the glue dried, and so forth. When the chairs were done I asked if there were other projects she would like me to do, mostly because I was having so much fun being around the little kids each day. She found other work for me (one I remember was making a large bulletin board) and before I knew it the school year was drawing to a close and so was the strike that had given me the freedom to be there.<br />
<br />
The "title" came about because when other parents came into the classroom, the teacher would explain to them who I was and why I was there. Her explanation was, "This is Zak's dad who fixes things." I doubt that she remembers saying that, but it always makes me feel good about myself when I think of it.<br />
<br />
Because I had always enjoyed making things, when your Uncle Josh "graduated" from his baby crib (and we were about to need it for your dad) I had made a bed for him modelled after the famous "Radio Flyer" wagon. This bed was about to be retired because we were getting bunk beds for the boys to make room for the newest baby, so I asked Miss Polly if the school could use it. She thought it would make a perfect spot for kids to use for "reading" picture books by themselves. Here is a picture of the wagon when it was being used as a bed. <br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgC7CFWWWRXfqNPcoOUH1kNuIDk_dC8Gv8ESZkHgnTvZRuBUBUdrSFU4f0ATTnDDziYuih4oka3PRg0PL5ovSk6bYSpAy05Hgt5W3wrErIq89f8D5mi5LRie5pJi3Ynv6nNPe7yjI6ppw/s1600/wagon+bed.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgC7CFWWWRXfqNPcoOUH1kNuIDk_dC8Gv8ESZkHgnTvZRuBUBUdrSFU4f0ATTnDDziYuih4oka3PRg0PL5ovSk6bYSpAy05Hgt5W3wrErIq89f8D5mi5LRie5pJi3Ynv6nNPe7yjI6ppw/s1600/wagon+bed.jpg" height="228" width="320" /></a></div>
That's your dad sitting on it.<br />
<br />
I don't know how long the school used the bed or the bulletin board or how long it was before the chairs needed repaired again. I do know I am proud of the small contribution I made and cherish the memory of the affection those little kids showed me while I was there.<br />
<br />
One other memory of that time sticks with me. It was a song that the children learned. I can't recreate the tune in a blog and I can't credit the author because I have no idea where the song came from, but the words went like this:<br />
<br />
"I'm something special,<br />
I'm the only one of my kind.<br />
God gave me a body<br />
and a bright healthy mind.<br />
He had a special purpose<br />
that he wanted me to find.<br />
That's why I'm something special,<br />
I'm the only one of my kind."<br />
<br />
It was just a cute little song that they sang for the parents on the last day of school, but I've never forgotten it and the promise of young lives that it celebrated. If someone had been watching me that day they would have noticed my eyes looking a little wet as I watched them sing. Except for your dad,I don't know where any of those kids are today, but they are still "something special" to me.<br />
<br />
<img alt="Grandma’sBriefs.com" src="http://grandmasbriefs.squarespace.com/storage/GRANDsocialbutton.jpg" /> <br />
<br />
<br />Axiesdadhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03273751356283986043noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-639400678385666398.post-8238103584339358692013-11-17T17:36:00.001-08:002014-04-08T10:58:09.640-07:00GRANDMA’S HOUSE<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjumycsRcXL7M5S8JCWVY8nZEA-NomoRFwDQRhHygQmB95pxAiAlCsPKkhx8W3qdOXXgf_E8a0lGI7YUVDzlBzOSxDBhyphenhyphen_EVJNENVFj_jVMqOA1v3smb96Q2blfaXK1tMJpehmMRVGH_g/s1600/IMG.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjumycsRcXL7M5S8JCWVY8nZEA-NomoRFwDQRhHygQmB95pxAiAlCsPKkhx8W3qdOXXgf_E8a0lGI7YUVDzlBzOSxDBhyphenhyphen_EVJNENVFj_jVMqOA1v3smb96Q2blfaXK1tMJpehmMRVGH_g/s1600/IMG.jpg" height="200" width="139" /></a>“Over the river and through the woods, to Grandmother’s
house we go.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It wasn’t quite such a
trip as that and we never made it in a horse and sleigh, but trips to
“Grandma’s House” were a weekly, sometimes almost daily, occurrence while I was
growing up. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have written before about
living in many houses as a child.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We
moved, on average, once every two years until I was a teenager.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>For this and other reasons, my Grandma
Freytag’s house was the geographical center of my childhood.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I cannot remember not knowing that house; she
was living there before I was born and until after I was grown.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Also Laurence, her second husband (more about
him later) was there until he died when I was nine.</div>
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Many of my earliest memories are from that house.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Holidays and birthdays were celebrated
there.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>John and I would often stay there
overnight when our folks went out for an evening.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Mother and Dad were married there.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Dad” was actually my step-dad and they were
married when I was four and half so I do remember the wedding.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I loved going there, because to my young eyes
Grandma’s house had so much more of everything than did our own home,
including, for a number of years, an indoor bathroom.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
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<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There were always cookies, kept in green
glass jars and stored on top of a kitchen cabinet.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I can remember, when I was so young that I had
to stand on tiptoe to see onto the table top, that jar was so high overhead it
could have been on the moon.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My brother
and I learned “Please” and “Thank you” asking for cookies.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It pleases me that those jars are still in
the family, now in the possession of one of your cousins who remembers it from
her grandma’s house.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Also among the “more” <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>things in the house were all sorts of exotic
objects and devices that Laurence (he insisted that we call him that, not Grandpa)
had accumulated.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Grandma and Laurence
liked to travel and brought back souvenirs of the places they had
been,<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>among them Mexican and Cuban
handicrafts and pictures from the Grand Canyon.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>He was interested in just about everything<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>and loved making things.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Two of his more impressive creations were a
loom (for weaving cloth) about the size of an upright piano, and a Newtonian telescope with an eight inch mirror.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The one that
fascinated me the most as a child was a working model steam engine, complete with a high
pitched whistle, <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>which<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>he would sometimes operate for us.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Because I didn’t have a “dad” between the ages of two and 4 ½,
Laurence was my first male role model.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
learned about using tools and hard work and loving from Dad, but it was
Laurence who gave me the attitude of “Everything is interesting,” that I still
enjoy today.<br />
<br />
Christmas was always spent at Grandma's house. The presents waited for us under the tree, but first came the Christmas feast with all the traditional dishes. Then came the longest hour of the year. "The menfolk" including my brother and me would move to the living room where the tree was set up while the women cleaned up after the meal (this was the 1950s). Opening presents did not begin until the dishes were done and everyone was gathered around the tree. Only then would John and I begin handing out the gifts. <br />
<br />
"Grandma's house" will always be a special place for me, the center of family, warmth, and security when I was a child and the source of my desire to be a part of creating such a place for my own children. I only wish that being long distance grandparents didn't get in the way of our providing you with a "Grandma's house" of your own.<br />
<br />
<img alt="Grandma’sBriefs.com" src="http://grandmasbriefs.squarespace.com/storage/GRANDsocialbutton.jpg" /><br />
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<![endif]-->Axiesdadhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03273751356283986043noreply@blogger.com11tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-639400678385666398.post-22959506465661429502013-11-04T07:03:00.001-08:002013-11-04T07:28:58.727-08:00ME AND TOM WINGFIELD<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgvn0xMC4fhII8J79y78pPM9fWPXyhtA7D2EXq06eOcio4Nj4Dg8cZ_qdE_vf49KK11AJ5fwMZn7BfcPUUmcU8wDOXo53mGKHtjk3MjQtz1xPOvRAnFMamznbq5t6vC6mEmwuBBgNmN1w/s1600/008.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgvn0xMC4fhII8J79y78pPM9fWPXyhtA7D2EXq06eOcio4Nj4Dg8cZ_qdE_vf49KK11AJ5fwMZn7BfcPUUmcU8wDOXo53mGKHtjk3MjQtz1xPOvRAnFMamznbq5t6vC6mEmwuBBgNmN1w/s320/008.JPG" width="247" /></a></div>
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The gate to memory lane this time was unlocked by a note on
another blogger’s site<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>encouraging her
to tell more stories about herself, and was opened by running across the name of a
teacher from my college days.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The
teacher was the faculty sponsor for the Drama Guild and directed most of their
productions.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I took part in several of
those productions, either on stage or operating the lights.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Most memorably for me, I was given the part of Tom Wingfield in
Tennessee<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>William’s “The Glass Menagerie.”
That’s right, your grandpa was a “thespian.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Probably I was not a very good one, especially since I was terrible at memorizing, but it was a lot of fun and a chance
to be friends with some of the more eccentric people on campus.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Campus” was Aurora College and at the time
it was a small, conservative, church related college, so “eccentric” is a
relative term.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We were very much not the
local chapter of the student protest groups that were beginning to claim
national headlines around that time, mostly we were just more interested in fun than scholarship
and possessed of exaggerated opinions of our own cleverness.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Rebellion was mostly nothing more than
breaking curfew and drinking rules and "protesting" about the cafeteria serving mystery meat..</div>
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<br /></div>
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College for me was much more about the extracurricular
activities than about the accumulation of classroom knowledge.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Dorm life, sports (cross-country and wrestling) and campus social life
added more to my education than any course or lecture series.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Participating in Drama Guild and working on a
student newspaper were two experiences that are still a part of me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The newspaper experience actually did begin
as a form of student protest.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A group of
us felt that the official on-campus paper was so dominated by the
administration that it was incapable of raising even small issues of student
body discontent, so we started an alternative paper.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Looking back, it seems we were playing at
dissidence, but at the time we felt daring and independent.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>However little we may have accomplished, we
did learn a great deal.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Deadlines to be
met and column inches to be filled required us to work hard for goals we had
put in place ourselves.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Voicing
unpopular opinions and sometimes making mistakes provided real learning
opportunities, mostly to learn that actions have consequences.</div>
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<br /></div>
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I can relate to those people who look back at their college
or high school days as the best years of their lives.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have been so fortunate as to spend the last
thirty-nine years (and counting) with Grandma B, so there is no question in my
mind that the best years of my life are still in process.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Even so, those years at Aurora College were
filled with youth, aspiration, camaraderie, emotion, belonging, immersion and
intensity that no other time can match.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
don’t know what “the college experience” will look like for you, my
grandchildren, but I hope it can bring to you some of what it brought to me.<br />
<br />
<img alt="Grandma’sBriefs.com" src="http://grandmasbriefs.squarespace.com/storage/GRANDsocialbutton.jpg" /></div>
Axiesdadhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03273751356283986043noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-639400678385666398.post-50012192677822575442013-08-30T18:50:00.003-07:002013-09-02T08:57:14.063-07:00REACH OUT, Even When it's not Comfortable<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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Since passing on some of what I have learned in life is
supposed to be one of my reasons for writing, I’m going to pass along something
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</span>I caught on to something I should have recognized a long time ago, that acts
of kindness or friendship don’t have to be perfect nearly as much as they
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A blog friend of mine suffered the loss of a loved one this
week.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She and I have never met, but we
have exchanged a few comments on each others blogs and I feel like I know her
well enough from reading what she has written to call her a friend.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In any case, on hearing of her loss, I wanted
to express my sympathy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>All the
overworked phrases, “so sorry for your loss” “deepest sympathy” etc. came to
mind but just seemed too trite to use.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>After some more pondering, I finally came up with something I could put
in a Facebook comment format that I was comfortable saying and sent it off.</div>
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It was only later, as I thought about what I had written,
that I realized it wasn’t what I said, or how well I had conveyed the sympathy
I felt that mattered, only that I had said something at all.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“I don’t know what to say,” is an often heard
refrain.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When someone is hurting, we
want to help but often feel that there is nothing we can offer that will do any
good and are even sometimes afraid we will cause more pain.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Unfortunately, reluctance because we might
say the wrong thing can easily be interpreted as indifference.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Someone once said, “The opposite of love is
not hate; <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>it’s indifference.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It isn’t as important that we always say just
the right thing as it is that we not leave the impression that we just don’t
care.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The grieving person might not even
notice that we have reached out, but if no one reached out their pain could be
much worse.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
As I think about this subject, I realize that I have been on
the other end of it before.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My dad ran a
gas station for a number of years after he quit farming.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He had a series of boys/young men who worked
for him and to a number of them he and my mother became almost surrogate
parents.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They listened to their
problems, fed them meals, celebrated their birthdays, and generally treated
them more like family than employees.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>When Dad died, I expected that some of those boys, now men, would come
to “pay their respects,” and I was acutely aware that none did.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m sure that many of them had good reasons
why they weren’t there, but their absence nonetheless caused additional pain in
an already painful time.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
When you can reach out to someone in pain, do it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You may not do it perfectly, or even as well
as you would like to, but you can be sure it will be better than not reaching
out at all.<br />
<br />
<img alt="Grandma’sBriefs.com" src="http://grandmasbriefs.squarespace.com/storage/GRANDsocialbutton.jpg" /></div>
Axiesdadhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03273751356283986043noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-639400678385666398.post-68107438413210221812013-08-12T08:54:00.005-07:002013-08-12T09:00:33.924-07:00THIS IS THE DAY<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgIwGk8Cp9Z5SiLc33-HoYMUmC0yMpAD-BE2se7qfkr2T7zEptSaRnNLJhH8-JtCsY1uLvHU_-WwWn0AeI9Qm8vv74KEdRXzafM7CpiC-toQ3pas1RIQdk6VLwt5p2_3_OQ2wFufWGfNg/s1600/014.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgIwGk8Cp9Z5SiLc33-HoYMUmC0yMpAD-BE2se7qfkr2T7zEptSaRnNLJhH8-JtCsY1uLvHU_-WwWn0AeI9Qm8vv74KEdRXzafM7CpiC-toQ3pas1RIQdk6VLwt5p2_3_OQ2wFufWGfNg/s320/014.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
The summer solstice is just a few days past and I am reveling in the long summer evenings. Thanks to daylight savings time and our location on the western edge of our time zone, twilight in June lasts until almost ten o'clock. Those long, soft, golden rays of light angling across the yard never fail to increase my joy. I know I must get annoying sometimes with my constant "Life is Good" mantra, but I just can't help myself. I can only hope it is infectious.<br />
<br />
This is another post that has been sitting around for a while waiting to get "finished." It is now the second week of August so I had better wrap this one up soon or let it wait until next year. The days have actually started their headlong rush to the miserable short days of winter; the sun is noticeably further south as it comes through our west facing windows at the end of the day. Crisp fall days with the smell of burning leaves in the air are not too far away. All this means is that I will have to look harder for the joy that each day brings, and not let myself think about the next round of warm summer evenings with too much longing. It's time to tell myself once again, "THIS is the day the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it."<br />
<br />
<img alt="Grandma’sBriefs.com" src="http://grandmasbriefs.squarespace.com/storage/GRANDsocialbutton.jpg" /><br />
<br />Axiesdadhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03273751356283986043noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-639400678385666398.post-68829173567665462102013-08-05T20:54:00.002-07:002013-08-12T21:50:06.665-07:00A WAR STORY<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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In the summer of 1967, <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"></span> having<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
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of my fellow draftees, with most of a college education.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In spite of these things in my favor, I was
as uncertain about my prospects in this strange new environment as any of the
other young men in my group of inductees.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I was, in a word, scared. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
We were harried and harassed by barking sergeants from one
place to another. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Tighten up that
line!”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Attention! Left face! Forward
march! Halt!”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Strange commands we had
never heard outside the movies came in a continuous stream.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We were lost and far from home, adrift in a
strange new world where we knew no one and any past experiences we had had were
useless and forgotten.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Looking back, I
can see that this was the first step in forging the bond that is the essential part
of turning a bunch of individuals into a unit that can perform the impossible
task of combat.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>By picking on us and
stripping us of our civilian identities, the sergeants were turning us into <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">US.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
At the time, it only seemed that they were bent on maximizing
our discomfort and proving that we were unfit for service.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They nearly had me convinced that this last
part was true, or at least something to worry about.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I remember being distinctly doubtful that I
could meet the army’s expectations, wondering, “Can I do this?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Can I be a soldier.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I don’t think I actually thought about what
the consequences of failure might be, I simply dreaded the prospect of failing.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Then, into all this fear and worry, came salvation. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It came in the form of another young soldier, a Spec4 (Specialist 4<sup>th</sup> class) working as a clerk checking the inoculation
forms of the line of men I was standing in.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>He wore glasses, weighed maybe one twenty, and looked like he would be
hard put to even pick up an M14 rifle, much less fire one.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He took my papers, checked them off against
his list and handed them back.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>As I
moved on to the next station I was thinking, “He made it through basic.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He has even been promoted.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What have I been so worried about?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If he can do it so can I.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
That was the last time I worried about “making it” in the
army, and when I left the service after completing a tour of duty in South
Korea it was with a sergeant’s stripes on my sleeve.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I came out of the army with the confidence that
comes from a set of experiences I could draw on for the rest of my life;<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>beginning with that one in basic training.<br />
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<img alt="Grandma’sBriefs.com" src="http://grandmasbriefs.squarespace.com/storage/GRANDsocialbutton.jpg" /> </div>
Axiesdadhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03273751356283986043noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-639400678385666398.post-38276241949717489022013-05-30T08:02:00.003-07:002013-07-10T15:41:46.894-07:00LOOKING BACK In a recent post, I said something to the effect that an autobiography by me would be dull enough to cause coma. It just may be possible that a talented writer of fiction (the "man behind the curtain" of most "autobiographies") might be able to make something interesting of my life story, but I don't believe I could. I have, since then, run across this statement:<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
"The (autobiography) shouldn't be so much about the facts and details of
my life but my attitude towards those facts and details," (Film
director William Friedkin quoted in a magazine interview).</blockquote>
Since I have been very free about sharing my attitudes in these posts, at least the positive ones, maybe this is an autobiography. Then again maybe I am just showing my grandkids the person I wish they would think I am.<br />
<br />
Anyway, then a funny thing happened. While I was thinking about my autobiography and how there really isn't much to say, the last line from Robert Frost's "Birches" came to mind. Something about reflecting on my life and thinking some variation of, "One could do worse than be a...." So the next thing I did was track down the poem (on the internet of course) and read the whole thing for the first time since college. I was captured by the poem in a way that I never was before! I've always thought of myself as pretty much tone deaf when it comes to poetry; The emotion escapes me, the metaphor eludes me, and I am left with little beyond rhythm and rhyme. Then suddenly I was the boy in the birch woods and I was the man reflecting on his life and wading at least ankle deep in eternal truths. I don't think I will be tackling "Childe Harold's Pilgrimage" or "Paradise Lost" any time soon, but I may go back and take another look at some other short poems.<br />
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This post has been moldering in the draft file for some time now, so I guess I should look for some way to finish it up. So here's the thing; reflecting back on life can and probably should generate some feelings of "I should have done more." But at the same time, "One could do worse than be a swinger of birches." In "Poems, Prayers and Promises" John Denver sings, "I guess I'd have to say, it's been a good life all in all."<br />
I have to agree with him.<br />
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<img alt="Grandma’sBriefs.com" src="http://grandmasbriefs.squarespace.com/storage/GRANDsocialbutton.jpg" />Axiesdadhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03273751356283986043noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-639400678385666398.post-57387947985821301842013-05-01T09:35:00.000-07:002014-02-17T09:56:09.354-08:00HOORAY FOR SPRING! JUST SOME PHOTOS<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiOa7NqwPGPDlIyDPrATVDZPXTzFhS528f4oBd_afhge0N5Fq1fBgnX3YuzGlKfG5v_ucSnrP1yLYMl2AYo7Dv0_oxjHZQBu7iDQnCbyhmGcg6cNOHCjOn8mwe-tqTXaLAQ0E778PZuOQ/s1600/005.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiOa7NqwPGPDlIyDPrATVDZPXTzFhS528f4oBd_afhge0N5Fq1fBgnX3YuzGlKfG5v_ucSnrP1yLYMl2AYo7Dv0_oxjHZQBu7iDQnCbyhmGcg6cNOHCjOn8mwe-tqTXaLAQ0E778PZuOQ/s320/005.JPG" height="240" width="320" /></a><br />
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A year ago (actually thirteen months) I wrote about Spring bursting on us early and enthusiastically in the post that I titled "Green is the color."<br />
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This year has been different, with spring dragging its feet and poking its nose out and pulling back like Punxsutawney Phil on a sunny day. Finally, it feels like it is really here and the spring flowers are offering proof.<br />
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What looks like a light blanket of snow in the neighboring pasture is really these little white flowers. I don't even know their name, but I look forward each year to their appearance.<br />
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Even these guys, who I will spend all summer trying to eradicate, bring a smile.<br />
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Violets are old friends. I remember bringing these to my mother when I was very small.<br />
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Tulips aren't wildflowers, but they and the daffodils do come back each spring to announce winter's passing.<br />
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<img alt="Grandma’sBriefs.com" src="http://grandmasbriefs.squarespace.com/storage/GRANDsocialbutton.jpg" />Axiesdadhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03273751356283986043noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-639400678385666398.post-76774897404405030892013-04-29T15:37:00.001-07:002013-07-10T15:42:13.749-07:00CLUTTER AND TREASURE<br />
Robin's "Ammaponders" blog on clutter:<br />
<br />
http://ammaponders.wordpress.com/2013/03/21/i-better-live-a-long-time/<br />
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included a line about how her daughters should hope she lives a long time because she is never going to get the clutter under control. Reading it made me think about two things. One was about the experience of sorting through and removing the "clutter" from my parents house when they died (within 6 months of one another after 53 years of marriage) and the other was about the "clutter" I have accumulated.<br />
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It fell on me to perform the sorting and discarding chore in my parents
house. When everything that none of the family wanted and that wouldn't
bring in anything at an estate sale was stacked at the curb, it looked
like it would need a semi to haul it away. Some of it was, I'm sure,
emotional treasure in my mother's eyes; much of it was stuff like Reader's Digest Condensed books that was "too good to throw away." When you grew up in the
depression like my folks did, there wasn't much that wasn't too good to
throw away. I have to admit having caught something of that attitude
from them. The saddest part was probably the old photos of people or
places that I couldn't even identify. Who were they? What did they
mean to my parents? Were they relatives? Friends? I'll never know.<br />
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I seem to be teetering on the brink of melancholy here so I guess
it's time to pull back. Memories and the artifacts that bring them back
are good things, things to be savored. I'm not one of those people who
thinks that some time in the past was the golden age when everything
was better, but I do enjoy the selective amnesia that lets me hang on to
the good and let go of the not so good. Drafty, unheatable houses and
too much peanut butter and boloney become the stuff of some of those
"when I was a boy" stories; fun to tell and stripped of all real
unpleasantness. Growing up loved and learning to love are the parts that
linger.<br />
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A certain part of my stuff actually came from my folks house and some of that even came from my grandmother's. There are no valuable heirlooms, handed down from generation to generation, just things that invoke memories. I kept a Reader's Digest Condensed book from my mother's collection because it is one I remember reading one summer when I was in grade school. I have a paperweight that Grandma Freytag brought back from a trip to Mexico; it brings back memories of her house that feel like a hug across the years. A couple of shoulder patches, a lump of granite the size and shape of a baseball, an old Monopoly Game and a lot of books I have read that stuck with me, these are all pieces of my life that mean little or nothing to anyone else and will surely be put out with the trash when I am gone. No matter, they help me to wrap up in the warm blanket of the past and relive happy times. I once said that each day as it comes is the best day of my life because it contains the memories of all the days before. These memories that I can see and touch make that statement all the more true.<br />
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<br />Axiesdadhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03273751356283986043noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-639400678385666398.post-9497228930790911572013-04-21T14:40:00.001-07:002014-02-17T09:57:43.373-08:00WHEN I WAS A BOYWhen I was a boy<br />
<br />
Inspired by:<br />
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<a href="http://www.grandmasbriefs.com/home/seven-days-and-the-language-of-love.html#comments"> http://www.grandmasbriefs.com/home/seven-days-and-the-language-of-love.html#comments</a><br />
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I just read the blog entry above, posted by Lisa Carpenter
(If you stop now and go to her post my remarks may make more sense. If you don't, it is, in part, about words and phrases that become a part of a family's lexicon and lore.)
It of course started me thinking of similar phrases in our family. "About twenty minutes," is one my sons will all recognize. Loosely translated it means, "It will be ready when it's ready," or "We'll get there when we get there." Really, it's only funny to us, and only funny at all, because it has been repeated a thousand times over the years. Mostly, it is an expression of affection between the questioner and the responder. I'm trying to think how to expand on that last statement, but really, if you don't get it I don't think I can explain it.<br />
My blogger name, Axiesdad, is another example. Our middle son, Zak, was born when his brother was three and his vocal skills were still a work in progress. Zak came "Ax" which somehow became "Axie" and here we are. "When I was a boy..." is the phrase I use when they begin complaining about how tough they've got it and this immediately gets the response of "Yeah, we know, 'two miles uphill through the snow both ways!' " In fairness to myself, there was a time when my brother and I did walk two miles to school (and to a one room schoolhouse yet) but it wasn't uphill both ways and if the weather was bad we got a ride.<br />
One more was "stuff in a pot." There were times while the boys were growing up that Jan (now Grandma B) was working in the evening and I would be the one to prepare supper. I have always enjoyed cooking, so this was not a problem, but I do have a tendency to "wing it." I would look through our supplies until I found some ingredients that seemed like they would go together and just improvise from there. When I was in the middle of one of these experiments and someone would ask, "What's for supper?" I would just say it was some stuff in a pot. This happened often enough that it became a stock answer regardless of what was being prepared, and "stuff in a pot" is a phrase still heard on occasion. I'm sure there are many more words and phrases that we don't even notice that have special meanings in our particular context. They are threads in the fabric that is our woven together lives, a part of what makes us US. It's nearing suppertime now, so I guess I'll go make some stuff in a pot. It'll be ready in about twenty minutes.<br />
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<br />Axiesdadhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03273751356283986043noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-639400678385666398.post-59636992734747870432013-04-06T11:51:00.000-07:002014-02-17T09:58:21.611-08:00MOVING ONI think it is time that I acknowledge the change that has taken place in these essays. I have wandered rather irrevocably away from my original premise "Things my grandkids should know," and have pretty much exhausted my store of "wisdom." My son's hope for my writing is that it will be a way for his children to know me if I am not around anymore as they grow up. The truth is, I simply enjoy committing my thoughts to this medium and hoping that they will be read. Since this changed direction does provide at least a small window into the personality of Grandpa B, I have decided to just run with it. <br />
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My thoughts today are being sparked by news from our younger daughter in law that she has embarked on renovating/redecorating their home. Since that home is the house that Grandma B and I lived in for thirty years until I retired, these changes give me pause. When she talks about taking down wallpaper, I think about when we put that paper up. When she talks about getting rid of the couches, I think about when we purchased them. The wallpaper and the couches, and the drapes and the carpets, are now old and worn out and need to go. Part of me recognizes this, and part of me is yelling NO, we worked so hard putting all those things in and we had it all just right; Keep it the way we have always had it. Of course, that part of me is wrong. It is no longer our home that they are living in. It's their house now and I love it that she is making it their home.<br />
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Of course, what I am really upset about is simply the passage of time. Almost forty years ago Grandma B and I embarked on the adventure of creating a home together. We are now a retired couple whose children are all grown up and gone on to their own lives. It is painful to recognize that we are no longer the kids who worked hard to turn an old house into our home and that now it is the turn of other kids. It is also gratifying to look back through all the memories that were created in that home. The memories won't be taken away because the house has changed owners and is now being changed. Making a house a home is definitely a labor of love, and it's the best paying job I ever had.<br />
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<img alt="Grandma’sBriefs.com" src="http://grandmasbriefs.squarespace.com/storage/GRANDsocialbutton.jpg" />Axiesdadhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03273751356283986043noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-639400678385666398.post-55503486913903201422013-03-20T08:43:00.001-07:002014-02-17T10:03:13.123-08:00A M RAMBLINGSAn early morning (for your grandma and me) phone call from the piano tuner has left me wide awake and swimming in a stew of random thoughts so here I am trying to capture some of them before they are all gone. As usual, in wandering through my mind I have stumbled over some of the bits of literature strewn about in there. I'm just going to put some of those bits down and then see where this essay goes. The first one was:<br />
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<b>CROSSING THE BAR</b><br />
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Sunset and evening star<br />
And one clear call for me.<br />
Let there be no moaning of the bar<br />
When I put out to sea.<br />
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This expression of Tennyson's contentment with his life (he is asking metaphorically that no one mourn for him when he dies) came back to me as I lay in bed with my wife's warm weight pressing gently against my back and one of the dogs snoring quietly on the floor next to us. The poet, all his accomplishments not withstanding, cannot have been more content than I am. From there I spun on to a line from the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous, "You will comprehend the word serenity and you will know peace." That's from a section called "The Promises," and it is a promise that I have certainly received.<br />
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"Now is the winter of our discontent turned glorious summer," floated by next, and I laid there for a few minutes thinking about how we do in fact make our lives "winter," not by being deprived, but by being dissatisfied. Like most of Shakespeare's protagonists, Richard III was brought down by his ambition and greed. Had he actually been content he would have escaped his fate. Someone put it much more plainly with, "Happiness isn't found in having what you want, it"s found in not wanting what you don't have." I guess that just brings us back to my "The Richest Man I Ever Knew" story.<br />
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Next, for some reason I started thinking about an anecdote I sometimes use when someone is railing about what kind of God allows bad things to happen. This isn't a story that is apropos of anything happening in my life, it is just where my mind went this morning.<br />
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<blockquote class="tr_bq">
Picture in your mind two college professors strolling across the campus of a great university like Harvard or Cambridge. They are discussing the philosophies of Nietzsche and Kierkegaard, Bertrand Russell and Teilhard de Chardin. As they are walking, one of the professors happens to glance down and sees that his foot is about to come down on an ant. Without thinking about it or interrupting what he is saying to his companion, he twitches his foot to the side just enough to spare the ant's life. That ant, going on about his business, completely uncomprehending of his narrow escape, knows as much about the philosophies the two professors were discussing as I know about the mind and plan of God. To tell myself that I know more is simply hubris.</blockquote>
Grandma B says this story is mostly about me trying to show off how smart I am by naming a couple of philosophers. I expect she is not completely wrong. I do know the names, but I had to look up the spellings. No one ever accused me of being a good student. The story is also a reminder to me that I have a great deal to be humble about.<br />
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This post has been sitting in the draft file for a couple of days now because it felt kind of unfinished, so here is one last thought to end it on.<br />
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I woke up again this morning so it's gonna' be another great day!<br />
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Axiesdadhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03273751356283986043noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-639400678385666398.post-90555219337106956982013-02-23T16:04:00.000-08:002013-03-20T22:34:45.885-07:00JUST ANOTHER GLIMPSE OF THE PASTI recently read<b> </b>a humor piece in our local paper in which the writer reminisced about working with her dad. I could relate of course, because I grew up on a farm where working with Dad (and Mother) started as soon as we were old enough to be of any use at all. It's sad that the family business/family farm has fallen victim to "progress." I'm no Luddite who wants to go back to "the good old days," but there are things I miss.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgEOWEH6w1tz-s6FgUsBDVRpmlBXUW03B9tRC-LdFvoPE7HVNUi2qgeg0AWn5N7psMysdw_nxddEz1NCiz0Texw2oL0lI6ZOHgMeoSFYL1TJUG9y1sGSG-wXMLvQawpVehUvho62Yu8Mg/s1600/haybaling1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgEOWEH6w1tz-s6FgUsBDVRpmlBXUW03B9tRC-LdFvoPE7HVNUi2qgeg0AWn5N7psMysdw_nxddEz1NCiz0Texw2oL0lI6ZOHgMeoSFYL1TJUG9y1sGSG-wXMLvQawpVehUvho62Yu8Mg/s320/haybaling1.jpg" width="320" /></a>It was a given on the farm that we would begin working as soon as we were able. The first jobs I can remember were feeding chickens and milking cows. Not long after, I was steering a tractor as it pulled a baler across the hay field. Each time we reached the end of the field, Dad would have to jump off the baler, where he was tying the bales, and climb onto the tractor to turn it around because I wasn't strong enough to do it. I was also too small to reach the pedals used to stop the tractor, but still I was working and contributing to the family enterprise.<br />
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A few years later, when I was about 12 years old, Mother took a job to supplement the family income. Because my brother was two years older than me and big enough to do most of the farm work, he became Dad's helper and I was designated to help Mother. This mostly consisted of having lunch ready when Dad and John came in from whatever work they were doing. Oddly enough, I didn't resent this and in fact still enjoy cooking today. Eventually of course, I was able to work alongside them doing all the different types of work required on a livestock farm.<br />
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Of course there was plenty of time to play too. The big difference was that there wasn't a gang of neighborhood kids to play with, most of the time I played alone or with my brother, your great uncle John. Imagination was the best toy we had; we were soldiers, cowboys, pilots, sailors, or anything else we chose to be. Perhaps the best part was having a three hundred acre backyard to play in. Pastures and creeks, barns and trees were our parks and play sets. Old farm equipment made as good a jungle gym as ever was, with the added benefit that we had to learn to be careful because no safety engineer had made sure there were no sharp edges or hard landings. We had a few scars by the time we grew up, but I think we were better prepared for the grownup world than we would have been had we been padded and protected from every hazard.<br />
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The creek that flowed through the farm was always a focus for exploration, play , and wonder. We lived on three different farms while I was between eight and eighteen years old and each one of them had a stream running through it that could go from completely dried up in late summer to a raging torrent in early spring. Even when I was high school age, I still spent many long summer afternoons poking around along the creek, occasionally still playing some of those imagination games that I "should" have outgrown by then. <br />
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Perhaps the greatest blessing of that way of life was one I have only come to recognize since raising a family of my own. Mother and Dad were always there. Even during the few years when Mother worked "in town" it was part time and mostly while we were at school. Usually we had two parents 24/7 . A short walk out to where Dad was working and I would ride on the tractor with him while he worked the field. There wasn't much conversation because of the noise of the equipment, I was just being with him, sharing our world with him.<br />
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Extended family was also part of that closeness. Going to visit or being visited by grand parents or Dad's brothers' families was about our only "social" activity. At least that's the way I remember it being through my grade school years. Getting together with cousins was always fun, and aunts and uncles treated one anothers kids as if they were their own. We were family in the best sense. I still feel some of that whenever I think about my cousins, even though I haven't seen them for years and only rarely communicate even by email. A big "social" event of the year was the annual Swartout family reunion. It was the one time when all the cousins would get together at once. The reunion was held at a park with a well equipped playground which was another rare treat for us country kids; swings and slides and teeter-totters were town stuff. The highlight of the reunion was always the meal. Every family brought something to the feast and, always, the women who prepared the food wanted to show off their best dishes. Not only was the food as good as they could make it, but for once we kids were allowed total control of what we put on our plates. No one insisted that we eat our vegetables that day and taking some of every kind of dessert was practically encouraged.<br />
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Dad, his brothers and sister; Mother and all the other spouses, are all gone now. The cousins are scattered, and a few of them gone too, but those days and the feeling of belonging are still a part of me and, I'm sure, a part of all of us who were there. I hope that whatever has taken the place of family reunions and Sunday visits will mean as much to you some day. Axiesdadhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03273751356283986043noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-639400678385666398.post-83494697401901762012013-01-27T09:20:00.000-08:002013-01-27T09:21:28.729-08:00WE ARE AN ILLITERATE PEOPLEWARNING! This is a rant. I'm going to claim a bully pulpit here for a few minutes. <br />
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"We are an illiterate people. When a person says something, we don't ask where he learned it. We just believe it." That quote (printed in TIME Magazine) is from a Pakistani man talking about how he had come to the decision to not allow his daughter to receive a polio vaccination, a vaccination that would have prevented her being a cripple for the rest of her life. I was struck by the parallel between his statement and what I have been observing in our own country for some time. We are no less credulous just because we can read; we accept any statement that supports what we already believe and reject any that doesn't.<br />
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A recent school shooting and, even more so, last years presidential campaign released a torrent of words. "All guns are bad." "All teachers should be armed." "President Obama is not a citizen." "Romney doesn't care about anyone but the rich." No statement has been too outrageous and the only defense necessary seems to be "You can't prove it isn't true." Even the most reasonable, sensible and modest proposals following in the wake of a shooting spree that left 16 children and six adults dead are called threats to the constitution. One NRA pundit even tried to tie gun control to racism. I've also heard, "We know it won't work, so why even try," from someone I actually respect. Of course, she is right that "It won't work" in the sense that making assault weapons and hundred round magazines illegal will not immediately take them out of, or keep them out of, the hands of people who would misuse them. (Is there any way for a civilian to not misuse an assault rifle?) Does that mean any attempt to control them is bad or that it is wrong to even offer ideas for consideration? Is it even remotely reasonable that either presidential candidate was a willing conspirator in a plot to take over the world?<br />
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I suppose I am really angry about this because I recently caught myself holding on to an idea just because I "knew" it was so. The subject was "Right to Work" laws. Your dad was for them and I was against. As he offered reasonable arguments to support his view, I realized that my response was basically knee-jerk; these were bad laws because I knew they were bad laws. Long ago, I had accepted without question the viewpoint of the union to which I then belonged. Thirty years later I still had not questioned that viewpoint. I'm still not certain it was wrong, but I am much less certain that it was right. I am now examining my willingness to examine my beliefs and finding it wanting. It's annoying to find out you aren't as reasonable and rational as you think you are.<br />
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It was Will Rogers who said, "It ain't what you don't know that hurts you. It's what you do know that just ain't so." We need to examine what we "know." Is it fact or at least a reasonable idea based on facts? Or is it just what we choose to believe? If we do not challenge ourselves to challenge what we believe we have no basis for challenging what anyone else believes. Be a skeptic. Question everything, especially your own beliefs. And be willing, but not necessarily eager, to change.<br />
<br />Axiesdadhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03273751356283986043noreply@blogger.com1