Sunday, April 22, 2012


“Home is the place where, when you have to go there,
They have to take you in.

That's a line from Robert Frost's "Death of the Hired Man" that I thought of while looking at something I started to write about the places I have lived.  Your dad and his brothers only ever lived in one house all the time they were growing up, an experience very different from my own.  By the time I finished high school, I had lived in at least (I have to stop and count on my fingers now) eight houses, two of which I have no memories of  because I was too young when we lived there.  When the building where "home" is located changes every few years, the definition of home has to be linked to something else.  "Home is where the heart is," probably sums it up as well as anything can.  While I was growing up, home was where your great-grandmother was.  I don't mean to exclude Dad, but he was my step-dad and didn't become part of my life until I was four years old.  Since 1974, home is wherever your grandma is.  I have to think that for your dad and his brothers, the house on 4th Street will always be home.  It is the only place your Uncle Ryan has ever lived.  Josh has lived there except for a few years when he was in his early twenties and your dad until he left for college.

    I'm sitting here wondering which was better, my childhood of many houses or theirs of one.  I suspect that most of the "experts" would opt for stability.  They are probably right.  On the other hand, I think moving every few years may have contributed to a flexibility and resilience that does not come from stability.  More likely, it really doesn't matter that much.  The number of houses, the kind of house, or its location are all a lot less important than what is going on inside them.  Hopefully home is a place you want to go and a place where, when you get there, they want to take you in.

 GRAND Social link party


  1. As Amara's Grandma I really hope she gets to live in the same home until she is old enough to move on -- say 30 or 40! That is the goal and since we are one mile away I like it! Her Mommy lived a lot of different places because of my job. Her Daddy grew up in the same home until after college -- they really want that for her, too. Wonderful post as always.

  2. I could not have said this better: "The number of houses, the kind of house, or its location are all a lot less important than what is going on inside them." Yes, yes, yes. My husband and I tried to create not only a stable home but one with good stuff going on inside. Sometimes we did great; sometimes we failed. Always it was better than what either of us grew up with.

    Touching post. ♥

  3. I can relate to what you say! :) :)